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Priscilla Sanaseei
22
21 March 1984
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Friday, July 29, 2005

Today was alrite even if i didn't turn up 4 sch as i got to meet ma peeps at mac.. then saeedah, soppy and i wen off ta eat at kfc... was really sweet of soppy... i missed her wen i was at simei... her jokes n lame excuses... haha.. i really should thank saeedah as she was all the way with me even though i had to go off at bedok at the time wen we wen home.. cos i had to meet ma sayang... things r different rite now... the love is fading... don noe y... i meet 4 the sake of love... the word called love... thing r different... he doesn't **** me anymore.... he doesn't need to... i only wanted someone who loves me... but i noe i can't succeed... change ma attitude for someone but that someone is nvr gonna realise that... i give up... do watever u wan if that satisfies u... but dun ask more than wat i have... u will lose me forever... if thats wat u wan... go ahead speak ur mind... now ma heart can accept anything... Any Pain i mean... thanks for telling that u r younger.... ma guesses nvr go wrong... i predict the worst for ma life n it happens.. funny ha!!!!guess thats it 4 ma life.... Thank u ma frens who r in ma life...

i can't get anyone like mathan... u wouldn't understand young punk... life need its own toll... he manages to die 4 his love... hahaha...

i wanna meet someone in life... but dunno who... nvm... bubye...

Me, my life 4:21 AM





Monday, July 25, 2005

hi..... hello.... i'm not that fine but fine .. i guess... i wen ta church yesterday n cried ma heart out n i felt relieved that i did... i dun noe how but it jus happened... i jus can't stop here.. i gotta move on... ma life waiting which consists of ma studies, family n frens... gotta go out n enjoy witta ma frens... its time to kick back i guess... i'm an aries... the first in the zodiac sign even though i dun believe in reading the future... i believe that i dun bow head to noone... no authority rulez me in earth except god la... i'm exceptional... special... if u jus can see that... i rule ma life...

As 4 mathan... hehe.... guess i jus played a joke on u... but it very serious if i let u noe that it is a joke... sorry boy... i jus can't come to terms of loving u... ur every word convinces me but it jus can't get into the thick skull... maybe i'm thick skin or vain i guess... n hey come on u r only 19!!!! and i am too old 4 ya...

and 4 ma punkprincess... i really thank god that u r there 4 me... without u where wld i go... on that very simple day... i saw u cry... why did u do that?.... in ma life ... it seems noone cared much... y must i ever see u cry... now 2 me u r priceless... hope u stay on with me forever... glad i found u.... i see the best fren characteristics in you which i have nvr seen in anyone... trust me in this... cos a good relationship consists of trust in it....

thats abt it 4 now... me in ma sch blogging again... doing the dirty secret job of doin it behind ma teachers back... hehe... gotta leave now ma fingers are aching.... tata... chiaoz... bubye... love ya all...

Me, my life 9:06 AM





Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Yesterday it started good and today it ended bad... or shall i call it worse... wat happen to me... m i over sensitive... i dun noe... well guys who wanted this to happen... it finally is happening... I BREAKIN OFF OKI... i dun noe y he toked like that but he didn't regret it... it seems like that.. no point crying... i wanted a guy who loves me but i got a guy who doesn't... dun noe wat he likes abt me...hmmm... well i'm not disapointed or angry but am relaxed... wen it has to happen it happens but i'm breaking off... cos i wan him no more... if he thinks it hurt me not a single then hes wrong... it hurts me the most than him... its like a game to him but i think its much more... i wanna be same old me before i lose maself in reality... not gonna love nomore... it sucks... been there... tried it... it hurts more badly... than the first one.... cos i love him alot... well its time to step out of ma lil love life n face the world... i dun noe how but i am tryin to... been to sch late cos i spent the whole night cryin not expecting all those things from him... couldn't seem to wake up... till ma sweetest woke me up... thank god at least i have her... i cryin inside dear if u can see that.... well i dun noe wat to say anymore.... i feel like shit... whenever i hear the songs i used to think abt him.... i tend to think abt him then regret... ma chubby baby noes nothing abt me... i really loved him u see... how am i to say gd bye.... ma lil heart is aching so much that i think it will stop anytimie... dun seem to like any guys in ma life except ma daddy cos hes the one really lookin up to me for all these years.... not even ma 2 bros.... no comments... no guys rule ma life noone except ma dad... i noe dad i have hurt u... i'm really sorrie won do that again... i'm breakin off... wish me all the best dad... its hurtin alot... i'm cryin now actually in ma class.. i don wan anyone to see it cos i'm no attention seeker... i'm jus plain old me... i tired of writing... i feel worst than ever... i feel like cryin... LOSING MASELF AGAIN....

Me, my life 7:38 PM





Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Well here i am blogging at sch... well the day started out well... until i reached sch to find out some nonesense... it all jus took 2 days... it all happens wen i'm not at sch... class is up to its nonesense again... i can't do anything more... it has happened n now we have to live with it... today in class we toked abt havin a class outing... some wanted bbq and some wanted seoul garden... well couldn't make their minds... so now i dun noe where they r at... aiyah all for worst...but it sounds interesting... suddenly at lunchto day i felt this hurting feeling come over me again... hey wat am i suppose to do? i asked 4 forgiveness... n i said sorrie n u still wanted to make it big... wat am i suppose to do? i was so giving in... which i have nvr done before... not even to ashok...do i regret it like wat ashok said? no la i dun... but in future also i dun wan to...its sickening u noe!!! i dun noe wat tosay.. ma phone is down... so sorrie if i can't call ya all...esp someone...i really wanna tok things out but wen the time arrives i jus become stun... not knowing wat to tok!!! oh gosh... i have to go 4 presentation meeting... which sickens me out...i jus seem to miss him every minute and moment.. dun noe y? actually its after that stupid fight... had a tok iwth ma akka.. was really relieving... but 4 frank i dun noe wat to say... ma akka said something which i think its so ridiculous... no linkage.... at all.. now that its all over... n hes who watever is in ma life.... i guess its jus fun for now...

Me, my life 10:35 PM







Well here i am blogging at sch... well the day started out well... until i reached sch to find out some nonesense... it all jus took 2 days... it all happens wen i'm not at sch... class is up to its nonesense again... i can't do anything more... it has happened n now we have to live with it... today in class we toked abt havin a class outing... some wanted bbq and some wanted seoul garden... well couldn't make their minds... so now i dun noe where they r at... aiyah all for worst...but it sounds interesting... suddenly at lunchto day i felt this hurting feeling come over me again... hey wat am i suppose to do? i asked 4 forgiveness... n i said sorrie n u still wanted to make it big... wat am i suppose to do? i was so giving in... which i have nvr done before... not even to ashok...do i regret it like wat ashok said? no la i dun... but in future also i dun wan to...its sickening u noe!!! i dun noe wat tosay.. ma phone is down... so sorrie if i can't call ya all...esp someone...i really wanna tok things out but wen the time arrives i jus become stun... not knowing wat to tok!!! oh gosh... i have to go 4 presentation meeting... which sickens me out...i jus seem to miss him every minute and moment.. dun noe y? actually its after that stupid fight... had a tok iwth ma akka.. was really relieving... but 4 frank i dun noe wat to say... ma akka said something which i think its so ridiculous... no linkage.... at all.. now that its all over... n hes who watever is in ma life.... i guess its jus fun for now...

Me, my life 10:35 PM







wat am i to say? terrible la... over sensitive la... one time an angel then the other moment a devil with an attitude... i'm sick down here n u treat me like this... wat am i suppose to say... well missed all ma frens in sch... y must i do all this? well i dun noe... I LOVE YA MA SAYANG...Nothing can change that... but somethings gotta change.... for the betta... oki going off... not feeling well... mentally and physically
Indian Princess

Me, my life 3:13 AM





Saturday, July 09, 2005

yesterday was the happiest day of ma life..even if it ended in a bad way.. i realli dun noe y... can't say much...it may be from jus 7 to 9.30 or 10... but it was nice... totally nice... the bracelet gave a special look... i totally admired the way it was... the price i would nvr reveal... the joy i nvr had.. i jus loved it... the twinkle in the eye...OH MY GOD... telll mi something... Study hard rite... well thats 4 now... really scared about student seminar... abt the presentation... y me??? am i that clever... or wat... i'm jus merely me.. don expect much from me...well today started horrible n syill is horrible... i feel one kind... no peace in heart ... y is there that feeling... i went to saeedah's place then i was forced to come back becos of some prob.. hmm.. wen is this gonna end... me and my mum had a lil fight.... wen is this gonna end?... well enough abt that... i jus miss him... 2 badly... bubye 4 now....tata
Indian Princess

Me, my life 5:48 AM





Monday, July 04, 2005

well mi at sch blogging again... actually havin sudden headache dun noe y but definetly i'm not stressed... well startin to save money as me not workin but wanna buy something 4 mA SaYaNg which i saw in perlini's... Nice u noe... but its bright silver... its pure silver combiantion with something else... its gonna be a month... wow time really flies... i really dun noe wat i'm doing... but i'm also worrying n feeling sick in love at the same time... tell mi wat to do... believe or not...oki dun let mi start ma nagging which doesn't end anywhere... well i believe in the lord as i noe he can help mi out of this confusion... really tiring mi out... stressing ma heart out.. i'm tryin 2 mind ma own business as i dun wan things to get out of hand... can't be bothered abt anything... whatever happens... i jus say whatever... some people jus have to realise something... i'm not a toy to be played ard with... ain;t gonna feel sorry 4 ya all now on... if i can't prove ma point then i'll play ur game.... the mind game... i dun care anymore... dun need frends who do the betraying game... once done... i'll be able to forgive... but more than that... its intolerable... so now forgive n stay away... its enough... oki gtg now b4 ma teacher sees me doing this bubye... muhahaha...

Me, my life 10:49 AM





Friday, July 01, 2005

You there, wandering earth's dust,
Dargging from desire to duty,
Mounting daily challenges,
Plodding through pain and pleasure,
Sucking at swiftly melting moments -
Rise higher and look down.

There we all are,
Circling the globe seeking meaning,
Clogging webbed roads and rivers,
Working our way from birth to grave
Beneath the shifting clouds and sun -
Rise higher and look again.

Ascend to God's throne and seehim
Reaching down with compassion,
Placing His son among us,
Creating redemption and hope,
Leading us to endless light and love -
Rise higher, look up and live....

Me, my life 7:54 PM








They wait for us bulging with God's goodness, ripe with his riches, restless to be released into empty, hurting lives bringing wholeness and hope.They are God's blessings, eager to be believed and received with gratitude. Christ's blessings for hearts open to heaven's best amidst earth's worst. We are blessed, dear ones, so ethernally, incredibly blessed. Beginning now.
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